Funiest Things You've Ever Done in FTL

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Funiest Things You've Ever Done in FTL

Postby Alsojames » Thu Apr 04, 2013 12:29 pm

What are the funniest things you've ever done or had happen to you in FTL?

Here are two of mine:

--I was once boarded by 3 humans. After beating them up with my rockman and mantis security team, they tried to teleport back to their ship. Before they reached the ship (i.e., after the sprites disappeared off my ship but before they re-appeared on the enemy ship), I sliced it in two with an artillery beam. Now their poor atoms are lost in space forever.

--An enemy crew boarded me right after they had blown my doors. Instead of repairing them, I vented the airlocks and bye-bye goes the boarding crew.
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Re: Funiest Things You've Ever Done in FTL

Postby ImplacableTardigrade » Thu Apr 11, 2013 3:33 am

Mmm, when a boarding party roamed unchecked and loss was inevitable I spaced the whole ship, my own crew and all. For the lulz, you see.
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Re: Funiest Things You've Ever Done in FTL

Postby Marinealver » Sun May 05, 2013 12:02 pm

Giving a take ship intact mission (not the zoltan sector one) with only firebeams as I did not have teleporters only to find a ship crewed by Rockmen. Fortunately I had a bunch of breach bombs but it was also a slug light cruiser so it had repair gel. When I was finished it looked like swiss cheese. With several hull breaches and not a single functioning system and 3 hull points left.

Well I hope that is intact enough for you.
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Re: Funiest Things You've Ever Done in FTL

Postby Mad Diplomat » Sun May 12, 2013 7:08 pm

Here is where I laughed the most :twisted:

I had a VERY nerve wrecking encounter near a sun. I won, but the solar flares and the enemy missiles / fire bombs really did a number on my ship. By the time the enemy was exploding, I had pretty much considered the shield room and all of the surrounding corridors lost since the fires were getting completely out of control. Just before I jumped, I moved all the crew to the other side of the ship and opened all the affected areas to space. JUMP!

As I arrive in the next area, a hostile Mantis immediately beams over a 2-man boarding party. But they materialized at the best possible spot - in the area that was completely on fire but at the same time the air was already almost completely sucked out. So they were both suffocating and being burned alive! Their health bars dropped so fast it was completely tragically comical :mrgreen:

I wish I could have gone the comm and let them know that they are welcome on my ship before they had died :D
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Re: Funiest Things You've Ever Done in FTL

Postby Ozei » Thu Jun 06, 2013 5:58 am

Got into random encounter in which slugs hack my O2 systems, but since it was L2 I managed to squeeze some extra power from it. So I got my revenge by destroying their O2 system and their engines, and since it was slug interceptor, they couldn't repair those so they couldn't jump AND they suffocated. I am so much of an asshole sometimes :twisted:

Another one was against mantis ship. They boarded me, but my crew beat the **** out of them - and since I had a teleporter and boarding drone, it was boarding time :mrgreen:

It's always such a fun to fight enemies with their own weapons :)

Also in one game I got a breach in one of the airlocks in the Osprey in sector one. I couldn't bother fixing it, since it made no harm to me, and if someone would teleport there, it would cause him so much a trouble. And then I just blew my way through the game and took flagship down - still not bothering to fix that breach :)
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Re: Funiest Things You've Ever Done in FTL

Postby 5thHorseman » Thu Jun 06, 2013 7:11 pm

Any time I find a fire beam, when I already have a rock man or two and a teleporter, is a fun time.
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Re: Funiest Things You've Ever Done in FTL

Postby nimitz98 » Fri Jul 05, 2013 3:38 am

I just had a great, yet tragic run with the Basilisk. By the time I reach The Last Stand I had 3 Mantis and a Slug for a boarding crew, along with 3 Engis and a Human for my ship crew, and for weapons I had a Burst Mk. III, a Heal Bomb, and the missile launcher that fires two missiles. However, on the first stage of the boss I didn't pay quite enough attention to the Flagship's health bar, and I missiled it to death with my boarding crew still on board. Oops.

Anyway, I just used an Engi and a Human to destroy the Flagship's missile launcher and then blasted it with my 1337 weapons. In the last stage I just let it burn out. 8-)


Ironically, I got my highest score ever. :lol:
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Re: Funiest Things You've Ever Done in FTL

Postby The Captain » Sun Jul 07, 2013 12:39 am

This isn't so much a specific funny thing I've done, so much as a funny observation. Among the ships I don't like much are the Engi B and Slug A, yet I've got a couple of my highest scores with them. I didn't play them much, but when I went back to them, I was a better player (and maybe had a little better luck those runs).

I won my 18th victory (12th on normal) in Down the Drain 4 (Engi B), and it has been my highest score till my 46th victory finally exceeded it. My 25th victory was in Slimeball IV (Slug A), and it was 2nd highest till my 32nd victory, and now it's 6th after my 46th, 49th and 42nd victories.

Edit: thought of something. A few times I've teleported my Crystal boarders over, say to the Medbay, thinking I can lockout the enemy and destroy it before they get in, no problem. Next I go to target my weapons. Then I look back and see my Crystal dudes are fighting. WTF? Oh, crap, I see my Teleporter has the rocks around it and realize I hit the lockdown button just a little too soon after releasing pause.
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Re: Funiest Things You've Ever Done in FTL

Postby Krimsun » Sun Jul 07, 2013 2:35 pm

not as much done IN ftl as done ABOUT ftl.
i was trying to sprite in a railgun (bad points of a missile and laser but massive damage) but must have mistyped the sprite box, so it was charging up and wrapped around to the other side. but the funniest part came when the laser was fully charged, and it flung a missile, SIDEWAYS, at the enemy. i laughed for maybe five minutes straight at the utter idiocy of my creation
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Re: Funiest Things You've Ever Done in FTL

Postby Krimsun » Sat Jul 13, 2013 5:40 pm

an even funnier one, same author as last time :P
i was going through the game's code a while back, making the augments all unlocked, but forgot to change the cost on each, instead i changed the valus of every augment to 150, fixed everything but the crystal vengeance, and forgot.
earlier today, i opened up ftl, started as the mantis-A, bought the crystal vengeance at a store, and all was good.
a few battles later, i was hit by a missile.
and my jaw dropped as, i kid you not, FIFTEEN crystal shards flew from my ship at random angles.
and so i progressed through the game, using the small bomb for myself to do 10-15 damage at once.
half an hour, fifty missiles, and seven sectors later, i was fighting the final boss.
i had sleepwalked through its first two forms, went to fire again...
and realized i was out of missiles.
i could do nothing as the flagship blasted me to bits with its super weapon.
i quit the game without a word, went into the code, and changed the value of the crystal shards back to 1
rest in peace, overpowered crystal vengance.

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